On Being's host Krista Tippett interviews Brene Brown about her latest book, Braving the Wildnerness: The Quest for True Belonging.
Brené Brown says that our belonging to each other can’t be lost, but it can be forgotten.
Of belonging: Brown says, "Yeah, we’re desperate for it. I think if you look at — if you look from the lens of neuro-biology or even evolutionary biology: as a social species, to not be wanted and to not belong to the tribe or the clan or the group meant death. We are wired for this. It is — John Cacioppo of the University of Chicago, who does this incredible work on loneliness, says that the only real biological advantage we have over most other species is our connection, our belonging; our ability to collaborate, plan, be in relationship with in special ways. And so that desperate need to belong is not a neurosis; or it’s not an ego-driven thing. That need to belong and be a part of something greater than us is who we are in our DNA............. Yet what we do to ensure that we’re accepted and fit in ensures that we have no sense of belonging.
I think the first thing that was surprising to me," she said, "is that at the very heart of belonging is spirituality — not religion, not dogma, but spirituality, and a very important, specific tenet of spirituality, which I believe cuts across faith and denomination and belief system. And by “spirituality” I mean the deeply held belief that we’re inextricably connected to each other by something greater than us. And that thing that is greater than us is rooted in love and compassion — that there’s something bigger than us and that we are connected to each other in a way that cannot be severed.”
And yet, we wake-up every day to a world that is in constant pain and suffering from a lack of true belonging, of the knowledge of the deepest truths of our existence: that before time began, we belonged-- each one of us and ALL of us, one to another and all to ONE.
Brene Brown reminds us of our humanity, saying, “Most of us are brave and afraid at exactly the same time, all day long.” Fear has, once again, reared it’s ugly head, and blow by blow is seeking to abandon us, to orphan Creation in her most vulnerable state. As pain and suffering fill our schools, our churches, our homes, our streets, our souls —may the truth of the inextricable connection of Creation lend us the strength we need to Rise and Resist in a Time of Fear. Might we, as people of faith, with a common thread that ties us together, a shared covenant of belonging that upholds us in a time of fear, give us what Brown calls "wild hearts" that are tough and tender and brave and afraid, all at the same time."
Holy ONE:
In our fear of abandonment, cradle us in the womb of your protective care.
In our quest for belonging, call us by name, to the birthplace of All of Creation
In our rising to resist, empower us with “wild hearts” that are tough and tender and
brave and afraid, all at the same time. Spirit is leading the way, Amen.
~ Rev. Jenny Shultz-Thomas